quote of the day

There are many battles to fight, and it isn’t just men who are called to fight them. Your concern and compassion for the world around you, and your taking action to shine God’s light into whatever part of the world He has placed you, speaks volumes about the kind of lover and parent you would be.

Develop an authentic, adventuresome and risky faith, one willing to follow God wherever He leads. Don’t mistake femininity for passive, inactive faith. Are you willing to get in the trenches and get a little dirt on your face for Christ? Nothing is more beautiful. Marriage and parenthood require a warrior’s tenacity. A girl [must be ] willing to love the unlovely and give without thought of receiving anything in return… — Boundless

 

to the beautiful ladies of first term…

First term at Sharon Mennonite Bible Institute finished on Friday.  As I reflect on all that God has taught me over the last six weeks, 24 girls come quickly to mind. Each of them showed me a fresh revelation of Jesus, in their own unique and precious way. 

The beautiful ladies of first term taught me so many things. Their fresh exuberance and easy laughter ignited a new enthusiasm for life in me. I loved watching them grow and learn. I loved allowing them to be my teacher, in many ways that they will never know. 

One of my favorite memories with the girls was in Abbeville, South Carolina. It was right in the middle of tour. We were all tired from riding many hours in the bus. The rain poured down. We pulled into a coffee shop for a quick break before heading to our next program. Last minute, we decided to have our “dorm meetings” at the coffee shop. We girls made a private little spot in front of the huge window overlooking a wet, gray street. 

I shared exactly what I was feeling. I felt like a little girl in a woman’s body. How did it happen that I’m all grown up? How did life change so much? Here I was faced with so many huge responsibilites, and all I felt like was a scared little girl that wanted to crawl onto her Daddy’s lap. Girls started to cry. A lot of them were feeling the same way. They were thinking about going home, facing “grown up” challenges, and they were scared. 

We read Joshua 23:10, “The Lord your God fights for us, just as he promised.” We talked about how God fights for us. And, we talked about how we need to fight for each other. We gathered around and prayed for each other. It was the defining moment of first term for me. When I shut my eyes, I see all of “my girls” in a little Southern coffee shop praying for God to fight for them.

And now they are scattered all around the world. I’m still praying for them, holding them close to my heart, and asking God to keep fighting for them. 

I love you, girls. You will always hold a special place in my heart! 

 

 

 

 

 

Quote for the Day

“Redeemed women of God have tender, merciful hearts, backbones of steel, and hands that have been trained for battle…” – elderedge 

 

 

a new chapter

celebration

 

Tonight I’m celebrating my boyfriend, Delmar Stoltzfoos. We’ve been dating since October 2. 

My life is full: learning to be a good dean of women at SMBI, a good friend, a good sister and daughter… and now the adventure of learning to be a good girlfriend.

Offering

I’m falling in love with these wonderful young ladies at school. I love being their “deany-beany-baby.” There are twenty-two amazing young women whom are full of life and enthusiasm. It’s a huge privilege to enter into their worlds and be there for them as they learn here at Sharon Mennonite Bible Insititute. I can hardly believe we are in our fourth week.

I’m learning a lot about myself as a dean. I was frustrated the first week, and I wasn’t sure why. I realized that it’s because I’m a very goal-oriented person. To-do lists and tangible results motivate me. People don’t fit very well into a to-do list. I get through a day, as busy as ever, running around doing so many things, and yet I don’t really “see” what I accomplished. It frustrates me. But, someone told me that’s how it is to be a mother… so I guess this is good practice. J  As I learn to be okay with just offering my presence and friendship to the girls, and learn the ropes of how to be a good dean, I’m beginning to enjoy my year here very much.

My word for the year is “offer.” So often I buy into the lie that I don’t have anything to offer. Being a dean runs smack into that lie and demands it to be confronted.  As a woman, I’m created in God’s life-giving image. I’m learning to be more vulnerable and offer life. It’s really scary, but it’s an exciting journey.

Pain and Joy are Close Friends

 

 “Sorrow comes to stretch the spaces of the heart for joy.” This truth buoyed my heart during many hellish times.  My heart is stretched in pain; now, joy is coming in—but as the joy comes in, I’m seeing that it is a lot like pain.

I’m learning that pain and joy both must be processed in very much the same way. I know how to “do” pain.  Throughout my teenage years and early twenties, life gave me many sad, hard things. The cards dealt to me, over and over again, were difficult and maddening.  I learned to walk with God in sorrow, and now I’m learning to walk with God in joy. And I didn’t realize it would be this hard.

Friendship, beauty, healing, the Holy Spirit and safety define my last year. I’m not sure how to properly handle the joy and rest. I fear truly embracing it lest it laughingly disappears.  But, I also know that I must own it as mine. The blessings of life are not mine to “maintain” or “control.” I must bring my gratitude to Jesus in worship and thanksgiving—all with an open hand, allowing all the joys to turn my heart to the Giver of them.  I need to put down my guards and celebrate and love life, receiving every joy with child-like wonder.  Help me, Jesus.

Happy Summer Memories

Visiting Myrna and Her Family in Canada

happy pumpkin moments

We got to spend last Saturday evening with Linda Weaver and her family in North Carolina. Yes, the memory does bring a very happy sigh and a little smile. Our time was too short, but it was treasured–ever single moment.